Things I Say While I'm Driving
Me: What the fuck are you doing. What. The fuck. Are you doing.
Me: NICE BLINKER ASSHOLE.
Me: Why the FUCK are we not even going to speed limit. Why.
Me: I AM GOING TEN MILES PER HOUR OVER THE SPEED LIMIT WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT
Me: Shit is that a cop? No.
Me: Shit THAT is a cop.
Me: /dinosaur screams/
SASUKE!! SASUKE SASUKE SASUKE

opintheot:

A best selling novel written by Uzumaki Naruto

diarycrux:

"I find it funny how all these girls are watching the World Cup but don’t know a single position other than goalie lol"

that’s funny because your girl told me you don’t know a single position other than missionary so sit the fuck down and shut your dipshit mouth